Status: I’m so complicated.

If there is one thing I know about myself is that I’m crazy and complicated! One minute I could be mediating and in the zen zone and the next moment I’m on my Amy Winehouse behaviour. I’m done trying to box myself into a category of what I am because I don’t know.

I used to like Jameson and now I drink wine like its water. I spend hours on YouTube learning Britney Spears dance routines to only get into the club and turn into Beyonce. I get lonely and dwell in self-pity then I get up preach like Oprah. To some friends I am Dr. Phil and to others I am the friend your mother tells you stay away from.

I will work out for two hours and come home and order the biggest burger at Steers, l am a hopeless romantic but I friendzone everyone. I count down the days until I can go back home and cry when it’s time to say goodbye.

I love so hard but my pride holds me back. I emotional yet emotionally unavailable to those who need to see it most. I listen to Tori Kelly until she gets tired of singing to me and when that happens I become Rick Ross and rap myself to sleep.

I love being at home and reading but I love to dance on tables. I love a good read but TMZ gives me life. I drink too much and cry about all my regrets and then I wake up ready to make new ones. I run 5km to only get home and smoke like a chimney. I get angry at God when things don’t go my way to only thank him later for saving me from myself.

I get high and laugh myself to sleep and sometimes I get too high and become Bob Marley’s wife. I work hard for months and blow my savings in 2 minutes.

I complain about my skin problems yet I cake on the make up and sometimes sleep with it on because I’m too drunk or lazy to take if off. I mediate for 10 minutes and open one eye to see if my phone is flashing. I vow never to drink again only to be the first to pour shots.

I could go on and on and on.

I’m complicated but that’s just me and I embrace my craziness 🙂

6th personality signing out!


2 thoughts on “Status: I’m so complicated.

  1. Your status defines so many people and yet so few will admit it. We all know craycray just like an alcoholic does not like to be alone so you’ll find her surrounded by a crowd of yep you guessed it other crazy peeps. Acceptance is the beginning of understanding oneself just as denial is the beginning of realizing that an individual has a problem, at the end of the day the choice is left in your hand. Love you girl

    Liked by 1 person

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